Five trends that make me want to stab people in the face

25 03 2010

Today is a MEH day if I’ve ever seen one. PMS is kicking my ass and I’m in constant physical pain. I’m depressed, I’m panic-inducing broke and my cat won’t stop pissing on every fucking surface she can find. Oh, and my kid is home on spring break.

Today can suck it and so can the weekend.

So, instead of boring you with more of my incessant whining, I’m going to bitch about five trends that make me want to stab the subscribers to said trends in the fucking face.

1. Everything emo.

When I was a teen we had goths. They were dark and brooding. Quietly brooding. Not the irritating, whine-ass drama queen in eyeliner bullshit that is everywhere today. Get your hair out of your goddamned eyes and shut the fuck up before I slit your wrists for you, you douchebag.

2. Repeatinggggg theeee lastttttt letterrrrr offffff wordsssss.

If you have any teen girl facebook friends you no doubt know what I’m talking about. You don’t look cool, you look like you have fucking Parkinson’s. Back away from the computer and go get back in the tanning bed, bitch.

3. Skinny jeans on fat dudes.

Not all trends are for all people. You look like an ice cream cone. And I don’t mean that in a good way AT ALL.

4. Facebook statuses that say shit like “97% of people won’t repost this.”

GOOD! That means nobody wants to fucking read the regurgitated bullshit, so don’t bother posting it. Why do people feel the need to turn everything in life into one giant fucking chain letter?

5. Leggings.

Those bitches died out after the 80’s for a reason. Because they’re fugly. Unless you’re under the age of 7, just wear some fucking pants.

The End.

Advertisements

Actions

Information

14 responses

25 03 2010
Tina

Good choices. I don’t mind leggings very much, though–except when people wear them instead of pants. There’s a reason why they are not just called pants.

25 03 2010
Ashley

Hey sluuuuut! I use multiple letters all the fucking time and you love me!!!!!

Get off the rag hoe! I want more combo words!

25 03 2010
amburgular

It’s totally okay to put emphasis on a vowel like ‘I knooooow’ or ‘Hey sluuuuut’ (hah) but it makes no fucking sense to add randomly to the end of a word, especially if it’s a consonant….like ‘whatttt the fuckkkk’ SO stuuupid!

25 03 2010
Stacy

I’m so with you on the emo thing! And I RARELY wear leggings, but when I do, they’re always a solid neutral. I don’t really get the whole crazy colored and patterned leggings people wear. Hence, all the ones in that picture!

25 03 2010
julia

i saw an awesome t-shirt once. it said: “my grass is so emo it cuts itself.”

too bad i don’t wear funny t-shirts, or i would have rocked that.

seriously, emo people. quit yer bitchin’!

25 03 2010
amburgular

Oooo I love me some funny tshirts! That’s one trend I can appreciate.

25 03 2010
Cocoa

HEY NOW!!! I lurve me some leggins, but NOT as pantssssssssssssss!! <~~ that's especially for you!! HAHAHAHHHAHAHHAHAHHA!!

25 03 2010
amburgular

You’re one of those lucky biotches that can pull off anything! Probably even leggings as pants! But please don’t. 😛

25 03 2010
Sara

We should edit that to read “skinny jeans on ANY guy” because even if you are skinny- they are no good.

I think most FB status updates are lame ass. At least I post useful stuff like, “My husband may be smothered this evening” or “Is it ok to tell children under the age of 12 that they need to stop being pissy motherfuckers?”

I saw a super emo chick in black sparkly leggings. Ew.

25 03 2010
amburgular

I think that’s why lamebook.com exists….and why I effing love it!!

25 03 2010
Steph

Ah, I will wear the stuff outta some leggings LOL

but I’m def. in agreeance with everything else.

Looking like ice cream? I love it!

26 03 2010
lambaround

Look on the bright side. Spring Break will be over soon! It’s already over in Albuquerque (it killed us at the kid’s dental office!)

Ugh…so.many.damn.kids.

Lamb’s Most Recent Post: The Chalkboard Door is for Holiday Decorating!

29 03 2010
Heather

HAHAHAHA I love this list. And I admit, I’m an offender of the multiple letter thing, but it’s usually to emphasize the way I’m trying to say something. I suppose it probably doesn’t work. Whatever. I’ll just doooooooo it anyway!!

And while I wear leggings, I stick with the straight black. I don’t quite get the flourescent pinks and greens.

29 04 2010
Throat Punch Thursday «

[…] can I say, some months I have the crazy, rant-happy PMS, and some months I have the anti-social, just pretend I don’t exist variety. You’ll […]

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s




%d bloggers like this: