Strip my mind

18 03 2010

I’m having what I call a ‘reflective’ day today.

One where I can’t seem to step out of my own mind.

My quarterlife crisis rages on and I get the impression that it will continue until the point where I can just switch over to calling it a midlife crisis.

A lifelong friend of mine just called me to share the great news that she is now officially a nurse. (Congratulations Brookie!)

This brings up the inevitable question to myself…..what the hell am I doing with my life? The answer seems to be….not much.

This is not what I pictured for myself at 25. In fact, it is so far from what I pictured that I sometimes want to double-check to make sure that I wasn’t abducted by aliens at some point.

I still want the same things for myself that I wanted when I was 18. I have just somehow made it impossible to get them.

I want to be an addictions counselor. There, I actually put it out there in black and white for probably the first time since I was 17.

I know I have qualities that allow me to listen to people without judgment and to have sympathy while remaining objective. I know I have a gift for getting people to open up to me. Sometimes people I’ve barely even met. I know that I have had an inside view into the life and mindset of an addict more than once. I know that I want to help people improve their lives and be able to view themselves in a positive light, and understand the causes for the behavior that led them to self-destruction.

I think about this often.

But then, reality settles in.

How would I ever manage to put myself through school? The Balls and Chain makes too much money for me to qualify for significant financial aid. Even if I go into massive student loan debt…..what would I do with my kid? How could I afford childcare without bringing in more money?

Even if I did pull it off…..what if I fail? What if I lose interest? What if I discover that I can’t handle dealing with addicts after all? What if I’m not smart enough to get through school? What if my health goes down the shitter again? What if I can’t function through my anxiety? What if, what if, what if….

I feel like something goes to waste every day that I sit in this house watching Blue’s Clues and making peanut butter sandwiches.

But, maybe I’m just overestimating my own potential.

Maybe this is the place I’m in because it’s all I’m good enough for.

Or maybe not.

I really don’t know.

Meh.





Guess Who’s Irish, Bitches!

17 03 2010

Okay, like 1/4 irish.

Close enough.

More importantly, I come from the craziest little Irish village this side of….well…Ireland.

Strangely enough…..it’s in Michigan.

Although I haven’t spent a St Patrick’s Day in Michigan in at least five years, I always get a little sentimental and home sick around this day.

Because to me, nothing will ever say home like:

  • green beer
  • bar fights
  • getting my ass kicked for not wearing green
  • ‘Kiss Me I’m Irish’ apparel
  • dirty leprechaun jokes

After all, only so many hometowns can be the home of the oldest tavern in Michigan.

The population may be less than 500, but every one of those bitches can out-drink yourface!

On second thought…maybe I’m okay with admiring from afar and being thankful that my nose won’t be the one broken this year.

Happy St. Patrick’s Day!

Especially to those reading from The Hubb. Represent!





It’s a beautiful day in the neighborhood!

16 03 2010

Do you ever realize how much more of your surroundings you notice when you’re walking versus driving?

Spring seems to be springing in these parts (for now at least) and I’ve been walking around my neighborhood each afternoon while the little heathen is off at school.

There are a few spots that I always find myself lingering or smiling at, or wondering about.

Today it is so gorgeous out that I decided to bring my trusty Kodak along and share my little neighborhood with you.

I’m so thoughtful like that. Click photos to actually see what the hell they are.

Little boxes on the hillside,
Little boxes made of ticky-tacky,
Little boxes, little boxes,
Little boxes, all the same.
There’s a green one and a pink one
And a blue one and a yellow one
And they’re all made out of ticky-tacky
And they all look just the same.

I adore this little house with the pink door:

There are two side by side little closed shops that I always wonder about when I walk by:

I wonder what the Unique Shoppe sold. Cats? Bird houses?

I am admittedly not a fan of churches or anything related to religion, but for some reason I am always a little bit charmed by this tiny church:

It’s just so tiny and so cute.

I’m sure you’re getting hungry by now, perhaps we should grab a bite to eat:

Because the cornerstone of an authentic Mexican menu is…..Miller Lite.

Ah, look at the time, I should probably wrap this scenic tour up soon.

But first, the shining gem of the neighborhood….what I refer to as the Witch House:

(Definitely click on these bitches!)

I mean really, is this not straight out of a Brothers Grimm fairy tale?

I love it. And I bet it’s just as kooky inside as it is outside. I’ll have get another picture of it later in the year when everything blooms. In the summer there is literally no grass visible in it’s yard.

Ah yes….home, sweet home.

Yaaaaay Spring!*

*If you live in a location that doesn’t get 90 inches of snow per year then you may not understand my excitement.





It was an honor just to be nominated!

15 03 2010

Hah.

Somehow I have been given my first two blog awards ever in two days.

OMGWTF!

The first comes from Crazy Brunette Chick:

Thanks…..I think. Wait…..wha?

Next, from Stacy at Stacy Says:

Awww!

I’m supposed to pass this one on to 15 newly discovered bloggers, but I am far too lazy for that shit, so I’m trimming it down to five and one isn’t so much newly discovered.

All rules here are my rules!

The lucky five are:

1. The blog I’ve been stalking since my first days back at HeathenMommy (RIP) : Jen at Problem Girl

2. Tina at Vomit Popsicle (because lovely is in the eye of the beholder)

3. The Single Girl and the City

4. Christina at Christina in Wonderland

5. Jane at I Really Suck at This

Whew… five was exhausting enough.

Thanks for the awards, Ladies. MUAHs!

So, I saw Alice in Wonderland in celebration of my friendiversary last night and I must ask….

am I the only one who would totally still do Johnny Depp as the Mad Hatter?

Oh, okay, good.





You’ve Got a Friend in Me

14 03 2010

Throughout our lives, most of us come into contact with thousands of people.

Most of them we forget the moment they leave our line of vision.

Some of them become intense, short-lived infatuations.

A few become our friends, serve our purposes for a few months or even years, and then go their separate way as we go ours.

And sometimes, only a handful of times in most peoples’ lives, you meet someone and know within minutes that your life is never going to be quite the same.

One year ago, when I least expected it, I had one of those meetings. I had no idea what was to come.

I’ve been lucky enough to have friends good enough to call best friends throughout most of my life. My friends have always been few but extremely close. Some have managed to stay with me through childhood, through the rocky road of adolescence, and are still a part of my life today.

But somehow the friendship that began that night last March was to teach me more and affect my being more profoundly than those that had gone before it, and in only a fraction of the time.

Over the last 365 days I have realized how selfish I was in my past friendships. I loved my friends, but with conditions. I forced my views. I judged. I believed in logic over loyalty, regardless of the cost. Actually, I’m not sure how I retained those friends over the years.

I have finally truly been able to see the value in not only having a friend but in being one. Being one when it’s fun, and when it’s not. Through hysterical laughter and hysterical tears. Through excited chatter and dead silence. Through joy and heartbreak. Through accomplishment and failure. Without conditions.

I know what it is to shed tears purely for someone else’s pain. I know what it is to feel helpless because you can’t take it away. I know what it is to converse without words. I know how long it takes for my face to start hurting from laughing. I know the difference I can make in a person’s life simply by being on their side.

I know now that I can give love and acceptance and compassion to another person just for who they are, without limit, and not for what their friendship can provide for me. And I know that I am a better person than I was when I woke up on March 14, 2009.

To my best friend, Andy, thank you for being my friend. And for letting me be yours. No matter what happens from this point forward, I will never be the same person I was before I knew you. Happy friendiversary. 🙂

I will always be there to laugh as you cringe in embarrassment.

And maybe by next year you will let me take a decent picture of us.






Saturday Suckas

13 03 2010

It’s the weekend and I’m feeling lazy, and we know what that means…..YouTube day, bitches!

Please enjoy some of my very favorite falls and fails and laugh until you snort just for me.

I hate weddings and the whole wedding cult(ure) so words cannot describe the joy I get from this gem:

Okay, I’m all for the environment and shit, but…trees can’t hear, losers!

OMG what could be better than a hilarious faceplant?

A hilarious faceplant on national television by a Nick Swardson look-alike who Thinks he Can Dance.

You’re welcome, people. You’re welcome.





Friendtastic Friday!

12 03 2010

That’s right, I’m starting my very own weekly installment of Friday love-fests!

Friendtastic Fridays!


Next to self-expression, the best part of being a blogger is forming friendships with other bloggers. Finding a kindred spirit floating out there in the interwebs and knowing that you would never have been aware of this amazing person’s existence  otherwise is what the blogging community is all about.

So, every Friday I will be selecting a few of my favorite new-to-me bloggers and slapping them up here for all to see.

Now, lets start this off right. In the past week (maybe two, whatever!) I have discovered what I think may be my two favorite bloggers ever. Seriously, these ladies are too awesome for words. But you know me, I’ll ramble on anyway.

First, my self-proclaimed “sister from another mister”: Stacy of Stacy Says. Stacy is a sassy Jatheist (Jatheist! Whadduya think, Stacy?) with a love for cupcakes, witty commentary and her super cute doggeh. Oh, and she‘s super cute too. Click the links, people!

Next, the feistiest “trophy wife with a trucker’s mouth” you’ll ever meet, Ashley of One Crazy Brunette Chick. This bitch isn’t kidding one bit about the crazy part! Go read her blog and you’ll see why it’s okay for me to say that shit. Seriously, this woman is badass and I totally heart her face. She’s a total MILF too. Just sayin’.

These girls are so highly awesome that I also have their buttons proudly displayed over there in my sidebar. ——->

So there are really no excuses to not check them out.

Now.