Throat Punch Thursday

6 05 2010

[originated by I Run with Scissors]

I know I haven’t been blogging much lately. I’ve been sucked into other parts of the internetz. But, when I glanced up from my computer last night and caught a glimpse of the news, I knew I had to take time for Throat Punch Thursday today.

What did I see on my local news program? This:

[These morons were protesting the repeal of the ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell’ policy, which is a whooole other blog post in these parts.]

Of course I’ve seen this before, (not that it helps me dry heave any less each time) but what really caught my attention is that the news anchor kept referring to these people as “Anti Gay Activists”.

Seriously?

Seriously?

Can you imagine the uproar if this this were a group claiming to be, say, “Anti Hispanic Activists”…..or “Anti Woman Activists” or even, say, “Anti Intersex Activists” (yep, that’s the new term for hermaphrodite).

Oh, but right, it’s acceptable in this case because God is involved. They have proof. It’s right in their Bible. That they got from church. Which is supposed to be separate from the fucking state, which means it has no place in the support or protest of any legislative matter. Buuut, I’m getting off track.

Let’s just say, for argument’s sake, that there is a God. And for whatever reason, he wants us to spend our time parading around like jackasses, holding up hate-promoting signage. Why not pick some other things from his book? I mean, there are plenty of other messages of hate to be plucked from the Bible, why do those attention whore gays get all the pretty signs?

Never fear, Le Meh is here, for all of your misguided, self serving, hand selected, bible based protest sign needs!

Leviticus 19:27: “You shall not round off the side-growth of your heads nor harm the edges of your beard.”


Leviticus 11:8, discussing pigs: “You shall not eat of their flesh nor touch their carcasses; they are unclean to you.”

A two-fer!

Leviticus 19:28:  “You shall not make any cuts in your body for the dead nor make any tattoo marks on yourselves: I am the Lord.

Leviticus 19:19: “You are to keep My statutes. You shall not breed together two kinds of your cattle; you shall not sow your field with two kinds of seed, nor wear a garment upon you of two kinds of material mixed together.

Leviticus 11:10: “But whatever is in the seas and in the rivers that does not have fins and scales among all the teeming life of the water, and among all the living creatures that are in the water, they are detestable things to you.”

Be sure to bust this one out at your little princess’s The Little Mermaid sleepover.  Hey, God hates who he hates. I’m just the messenger.

Because it’s a whole lot easier to pick something out of your holy book that you can despise when it doesn’t apply to you. I mean, let’s face it,  it’s way more convenient to pick a day every couple of years to parade around with a gay bashing sign than it is to give up eating pork or wearing fabric blends.

And if society lets you get away with claiming to be an “activist”, well, then it’s totally okay.

Right?

No.

THROAT PUNCH!

I will from now on be referring to myself as an Anti Bible Thumping Ignorant Redneck Fuck Activist. I will accept AB TIRF Activist for short.

Thankyouverymuch.

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15 responses

6 05 2010
randomblogette

OMG! I love this. I was just checking to see if anyone else was still doing TPT and I found you! This post is awesome. Some people are such dipshits. Wasn’t there something in the Bible saying do not judge unless you want to be judged? yeah Judgy Judgersons…your time will come! Oh and I am going to hell anyways because I am married to a Jew!

6 05 2010
amburgular

OMG what an honor for you to stop by my TPT!!! Seriously….best blog feature idea I’ve ever seen.
Judgy Judgersons….hahahahaa love it!
I’m an atheist, so it’s all the same to me, but even we godless heathens can see that if you’re going to base your life on something, you should base it on the entire thing, not just the parts that are convenient for you, otherwise don’t bother!

6 05 2010
Andy

Hehehehehe Ab Tirf

6 05 2010
amburgular

♥ ♥ ♥ yourface 😀

6 05 2010
Annabelle

God hates polyester- LMAO.

If people want to have an honest, educated discussion on gay RIGHTS (not, simply, homosexuals) I am more than willing to grant them that. I’ll even listen. They have their own rights, after all, even the right to be freaking ridiculous. But this? … Seriously? Go back to your tea party.

7 05 2010
amburgular

Exactly. The fucking economy is collapsing, oils spills and killer storms everywhere, and THIS is what these people concern themselves with?

Sickening.

6 05 2010
Amber

God hates polyester, but he doesn’t hate Betty White, right?

7 05 2010
amburgular

Hey like I said, I’m just the messenger.

7 05 2010
Ashley

These pissant, rat bastards! They can’t just let anyone be happy. They have to shit all over everyone else because of something wrong in THEIR lives.

Dumb fucking cunts.

7 05 2010
amburgular

Couldn’t have said it better myself you classy bitch!

7 05 2010
Nacia Walsh

Love this post! God hates the gays but doesn’t hate fear-mongering ass-hats who believe that people have a choice about who they love? People are insane. My
god is down with it all: the blacks, the jews, the gays, the prudes, the pork-eating dudes, and cross-dressers with boobs.

7 05 2010
amburgular

That sounds like the beginnings of a hit song to me, woman!

13 05 2010
Georgette

Baahahaha. This was great. I really hope God doesn’t hate Betty White though. Why is she all of a sudden so trendy now?

17 05 2010
Taylor

AMEN. It’s ridiculous that people are allowed to do things like that, it should be illegal. Close-minded people make me so so so mad, I’m glad you posted this. Love it.

18 05 2010
Stacy

Hey sista! Where you been lately?

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