Yeah, I Suck

20 05 2010


I haven’t been posting lately. Why? Because I’m depressed as hell and I’m a bitter little bitch.

I don’t want to post about how I’m so broke I have to skip a bill or two every month to buy groceries or about how I can’t seem to get even a shitty part time minimum wage job and I’ll never get to go to school and woe is me I hate my life, blah blah fucking blah.

I also haven’t been reading many of you because, like I said, I’m a fucking bitter bitch and I don’t want to hear about how you’re graduating college or got a sweet new job or how you’re going on an expensive vacation with your perfect spouse or spending the weekend at the spa, or can’t decide whether you want to become a lawyer or a doctor.


until I have something other than negativity* to spread around, I’ll probably be staying pretty quiet.

I’ll be back.

*Obviously this blog is built on negativity, but I mean negativity that isn’t even entertaining.


Throat Punch Thursday

6 05 2010

[originated by I Run with Scissors]

I know I haven’t been blogging much lately. I’ve been sucked into other parts of the internetz. But, when I glanced up from my computer last night and caught a glimpse of the news, I knew I had to take time for Throat Punch Thursday today.

What did I see on my local news program? This:

[These morons were protesting the repeal of the ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell’ policy, which is a whooole other blog post in these parts.]

Of course I’ve seen this before, (not that it helps me dry heave any less each time) but what really caught my attention is that the news anchor kept referring to these people as “Anti Gay Activists”.



Can you imagine the uproar if this this were a group claiming to be, say, “Anti Hispanic Activists”…..or “Anti Woman Activists” or even, say, “Anti Intersex Activists” (yep, that’s the new term for hermaphrodite).

Oh, but right, it’s acceptable in this case because God is involved. They have proof. It’s right in their Bible. That they got from church. Which is supposed to be separate from the fucking state, which means it has no place in the support or protest of any legislative matter. Buuut, I’m getting off track.

Let’s just say, for argument’s sake, that there is a God. And for whatever reason, he wants us to spend our time parading around like jackasses, holding up hate-promoting signage. Why not pick some other things from his book? I mean, there are plenty of other messages of hate to be plucked from the Bible, why do those attention whore gays get all the pretty signs?

Never fear, Le Meh is here, for all of your misguided, self serving, hand selected, bible based protest sign needs!

Leviticus 19:27: “You shall not round off the side-growth of your heads nor harm the edges of your beard.”

Leviticus 11:8, discussing pigs: “You shall not eat of their flesh nor touch their carcasses; they are unclean to you.”

A two-fer!

Leviticus 19:28:  “You shall not make any cuts in your body for the dead nor make any tattoo marks on yourselves: I am the Lord.

Leviticus 19:19: “You are to keep My statutes. You shall not breed together two kinds of your cattle; you shall not sow your field with two kinds of seed, nor wear a garment upon you of two kinds of material mixed together.

Leviticus 11:10: “But whatever is in the seas and in the rivers that does not have fins and scales among all the teeming life of the water, and among all the living creatures that are in the water, they are detestable things to you.”

Be sure to bust this one out at your little princess’s The Little Mermaid sleepover.  Hey, God hates who he hates. I’m just the messenger.

Because it’s a whole lot easier to pick something out of your holy book that you can despise when it doesn’t apply to you. I mean, let’s face it,  it’s way more convenient to pick a day every couple of years to parade around with a gay bashing sign than it is to give up eating pork or wearing fabric blends.

And if society lets you get away with claiming to be an “activist”, well, then it’s totally okay.




I will from now on be referring to myself as an Anti Bible Thumping Ignorant Redneck Fuck Activist. I will accept AB TIRF Activist for short.


Friendtastic Friday 4/30

30 04 2010

That’s right, Friendtastic Friday is back (and finally has it’s own graphic)! And I have some kickass bloggers for you to befriend!

First, I send you to meet Heather at Boyfriend Challenged, where she reports the honest, sometimes brutal, and usually hilarious reality of living chronically single.

Next, I must let you in on Annabelle at I’ll Tell You Anyway. Seriously, stop what you’re doing and go read this blog. If you like my bad attitude (and clearly you do if you’re still reading) you will love hers. And she gets to add dating to the mix. Hilarity and sarcasm ensue.

I love the word ensue.

Anyway….go! Read! Thank me later.

Throat Punch Thursday

29 04 2010

Yeah yeah, I realize I haven’t posted in almost a week and you’re all crying into your beers, dying for a word from me.

What can I say, some months I have the crazy, rant-happy PMS, and some months I have the anti-social, just pretend I don’t exist variety. You’ll get used to it.


It’s time again for Throat Punch Thursday, originated by I Run with Scissors.

Who has incurred my wrath this week, you ask?

The honor this Thursday day goes toooooooooo:

Facebook Dramatards!

Social media is the death of healthy social interactions. What the fuck is wrong with the picture when people can’t even have one on one arguments anymore? Instead it takes place 100% through passive aggressive “status updates” addressing no one in particular, though clearly meant for someone quite particular indeed.

I’ve done it. I bet you’ve done it.

When did we become such socially retarded pussies?

Whatever happened to the days when if you had a beef with your friend, you fucking called them or met up and discussed it like adults? Or punched  each other in the face a few times and then got over it.


Though we’ve all done it a time or two, everyone has a king/queen of internet drama somewhere in their list of friends. Every week they have some kind of end-of-the-world cat fight catastrophe going down on their page.

And to you, Facebook Dramatard,


You fucking suck.

I feel better.

Throat Punch Thursday

23 04 2010

Yes, I know it’s Friday. But I just discovered Throat Punch Thursday and I really want to participate, and damn it, it’s my blog and I’ll suspend reality if I fucking want to, so,  I declare it Thursday on Le Meh.

Dear Mom Who Gives Me a Look of Disdain for Sitting on a Bench and Texting While My Kid Plays at the Park,

I’m glad I could brighten your day by helping you to feel superior to parents like me. I could tell you about how yesterday I was here bouncing up and down on the see-saw with my son on my lap until I thought my ass was going to flatten like a pancake. I could tell you how the day before, I was here playing tag with my kid and his friends-of-moment and totally bit it in a pile of wood chips.

I could tell you how I get a break from my house and toddler routine about as often as I see a falling star, or about how I believe helicopter parents are destroying our next generation. I could explain how while sometimes I play with my child at the park, other times I come to let him burn off some energy with other kids while I zone out and take some time to my fucking self. But, none of that matters to you anyway. You’ve already made your bitchy little snap judgment, and now you’re busy making sure little Mikey sanitizes his hands every time he touches a new piece of playground equipment.

So, instead of that healthy discourse, how about I just punch you in the fucking throat.

Ahh. I feel better.

Throat Punch Thursday was created by Sarah at Running with Scissors. Grab the button and join the party!

You’re a Wha…?

22 04 2010

I’m a member of an online community of 20something Bloggers (even though I don’t have the badge up because WordPress sucks and I haven’t made my own html graphic yet like I did for my Facebook fan box, which was a waste of time for my whopping two fans. Update: 3 fans! Woohoo Kristen Brumm!)


Recently there was a topic posted in the forums about 20something virgins. Personally I was shocked at how many spoke up to say that they too, were strangers to the s-e-x at ages like 20, 24 or 26.

Now, I have no problem with people choosing not to have sex. I haven’t known what it was like to be a virgin since the tender age of 14, so it’s pretty difficult for me to imagine it at the age of 20 or 24. But, theoretically, it’s not something I’m going to oppose.

What does irk me is the preoccupation that so many virgins seem to have with their own sexual status. They feel the need to inform people of their choice and then watch for a negative reaction so that they can report back to the others that they were outcast and victimized.

Bottom line, if you choose to remain a virgin until you’re married, or until you’re 40, or whatever it is that you’re waiting for, and you feel the need to make it your prime goal in life to talk about it, don’t complain when some people react badly. You are the one defining yourself by your sexual preferences, the recipient of your revelation is only following suit. And that, in my opinion is the opposite of social progress.

Whether or not you have sex does not make you who you are. Which gender you prefer sexually does not make you who you are. Your nose hook fetish does not make you who you are (favorite search engine term of the week. Sorry to disappoint you, random Googler). If you let these things define you, then you are no better than the person judging you for them.

In the year 2010, I would think people could let go of things like the virgin label. Who cares?

Sex is a mere physical act between two animals. Basing your worth (and others) as a person on something so petty is beyond my understanding. As are many things lately.

Stoner History 101: 4.20

20 04 2010

I’m back!

The beasts in my sinuses are being eradicated as we speak by my good friend, Zithromax, and just in time for the biggest stoner holiday of the year.

Most people who have had any exposure to “cannabis culture” have heard 4.20 referenced, but do you really know where it comes from?

Legend has it, in 1971, a group of California teenagers were tipped off to the existence of an abandoned cannabis crop near Point Reyes. Each afternoon the group would meet after school at 4:20 at the Louis Pasteur statue to smoke marijuana and go looking for the fabled crop. The abandoned plants were never found, but the smoking ritual remained. The group called themselves the “Waldos” due to their tendency to hang out against a wall after school.

It just so happened that one of the Waldos had a brother with a connection to the Grateful Dead. The boys had regular contact (and smoke outs) with the Dead, who would spread 4.20 as a stoner term throughout the nation.

Today, activists for legalization of marijuana use 4.20 as a day to not only celebrate and consume cannabis, but also to educate about its uses and advocate its decriminalization in non-medical form in the US.

The largest annual celebration takes place on the University of Colorado’s Boulder campus. The past two years’ events in Boulder have included over 10,000 attendees.

So, have a happy 4.20 everyone! I know I will. 😉 And keep an eye out for future Stoner History 101 posts.